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Mark Twain Quotes

Samuel Langhorne Clemens (1835–1910), better known by his pen name Mark Twain, was an American author and humorist.

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The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.


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Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.


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Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen.


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Do the right thing. It will gratify some people and astonish the rest.


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The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.


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Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.


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All generalizations are false, including this one.


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Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.


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A man is never more truthful than when he acknowledges himself a liar.


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Patriotism is supporting your country all the time, and your government when it deserves it.


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The lack of money is the root of all evil.


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The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not.


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Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.


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Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.


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Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.


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It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog.


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The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter.


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Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do, so throw off the bowlines, sail away from safe harbor, catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore, Dream, Discover.


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Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.


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Denial ain't just a river in Egypt.


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There are lies, damned lies and statistics.


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It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to open one's mouth and remove all doubt.


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Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.


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Only one thing is impossible for God: To find any sense in any copyright law on the planet.


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Apparently there is nothing that cannot happen today.

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